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How to Help Your Preschooler Navigate Big Emotions

It can be hard to help kids deal with their big feelings, but it’s an important part of being a parent. Kids are better off when they can recognize and deal with their feelings. Children have the same emotions as adults: anger, sadness, and sorrow. But they might not have the words or skills to deal with those feelings like we do.

Like many parents, you may struggle to stay calm while helping your child deal with their feelings. The good news is preschoolers can learn to navigate these big emotions with the help of their parents and caregivers at their Olney preschool.

Is It Normal for a 4-Year-Old to be Extremely Emotional?

Four-year-olds are naturally passionate! At this age, the brain is constantly growing and changing. Your child’s limbic system is seeing some of the most growth. The fight-or-flight reaction depends on this system. As it grows, it’s like a home alarm system that is too sensitive and goes off every time something runs by because it’s not set up right.

Your child’s brain is just starting to learn how to do more complex things, like controlling their emotions, so there will be some problems along the way. If you teach your kids to stay calm, they’ll be better able to handle their feelings.

A mother consoling her little upset daughter.

How to Help a 4-Year-Old Deal With Emotions?

Temper tantrums are common with preschoolers because they feel their emotions strongly. It may seem like they’re always about to lose it because they don’t know how to talk about their feelings. You can help them understand these thoughts and teach them ways to talk about how they feel.

These methods have been shown to work to help parents and caregivers at a preschool in Olney teach these important skills to kids.

Learn to Name How They Feel

Children of all ages benefit from learning about feelings. From newborns and up, it’s important to start talking to children about feelings. Although it’s not a two-sided conversation with infants, they still benefit from seeing your facial expressions.

Begin with the basic emotions, such as happiness, sadness, and anger. When those feelings arise, assist them in recognizing them. For instance, “You are happy when we play together,” or “You are mad that we can’t play at the park anymore.” The more they can recognize their feelings, the simpler it will be for children to start expressing their emotions to you.

Books and TV shows can also help you pinpoint the emotions you observe in other people. Ask, “How do you think they feel right now?” and discuss possible causes of their emotions. This can foster a greater sense of empathy in your youngster for the feelings of others.

Little children with drawn emoticons on color background

Validate How They are Feeling

One of the most important things for kids of all ages is recognizing their feelings, even if they don’t know what they are. Preschoolers often have no idea how they are feeling, so it’s up to parents and caregivers to acknowledge the feelings so kids can learn to identify them.

First, let them know that you know they are feeling a certain way. Acknowledging their feelings goes a long way in helping them learn to express themselves. For example, you could say, “I can see that this makes you angry,” or “It looks like you’re worried about something.” Say something like, “Are you worried about something?” or “Are you feeling sad?” if you don’t know what your child is feeling but can tell they are having a bad mood. This action can lessen the bad feeling on its own.

Take a minute to make sure they understand why they feel that way. When you validate a child’s feelings, you do not ask them to explain or justify why they think that way. Instead, you confirm their feelings. Parents should listen to what their kids say instead of making them explain their feelings.

Teach Them to Express Emotions

Kids don’t always know how to deal with strong emotions when they have them. This can make them whine and cry, or they might even act aggressively by hitting. Teaching them simple ways to deal with their feelings, like belly breathing, stretching, or getting help from an adult they trust, can help them control their reactions and avoid losing control.

You could also ask them to name the body parts from which the feelings come. With this activity, you can take their minds off their rage and bring them back to the present. Your child will start to do these things on their own faster if you encourage them and show them how to do them.

Mother sitting and comforting her son on the couch.

Watch How You React

Many toddlers love it when somebody compliments them. Acknowledging something your toddler is doing will make them want to keep doing it. Give your child lots of praise when they do something good, like sharing their toys or talking about how they feel. Hug them and tell them they did a great job. You can praise them for things like calming down or getting back in control after a tantrum. As you praise and reward these good actions, they’ll happen more often.

When Should Parents Step in to Help?

Knowing when to let preschoolers figure things out on their own and when an adult must step in to help is crucial. It’s about finding the perfect balance between the two. Preschoolers don’t always have the skills needed to work through big emotions, so you must watch to see when stepping in is right. Then, work with your child to help handle the problem.

Even as adults, there are still occasions when it can be hard for us to think rationally. Since toddlers lack the capacity for reason, it is impossible for them to think logically.

Therefore, as soon as things settle down following any kind of breakdown, make sure to discuss the incident with them. Assist your child in understanding what transpired, their feelings, and possible alternatives to their reaction. Discuss what went well and how to improve for the next time.

Final Thoughts

A lot of strong feelings come up in childhood, and most of those feelings don’t make sense to adults, let alone to preschoolers. Parents and caregivers at a preschool in Olney, MD, can help kids live fuller, more meaningful lives by accepting their feelings, teaching them how to understand, communicate, and control them, and letting them know that we see and understand them.

 

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